FEAR - What is it? Why is it important?
The word FEAR sends all sorts of emotions and feelings through us all. Originally this concept was installed in each of us a method for keeping safe from the Sabre Tooth Tiger and other threats when we first started to walk on this planet we all call home.
However as time has gone by, those threats have been replaced by different, at times more dangerous, more villainous, more threatening and more damaging.
Some of our fears are justified by experience and knowledge, and some of them are completely made up things that we tell ourselves to stop us doing something we either do not want to do or do not know how to do.
Fear may be as old as human life on Earth. It is a fundamental, deeply wired reaction, evolved over the history of time and biology of protection of man. It has been formed with the ability to protect organisms against perceived threat. Now fear may be as simple as a swift reaction of the antenna of a snail that is touched, or as complex as existential anxiety in a human. (this one I understand from personal experience)
Whether we love or hate to experience fear, it’s hard to deny that we certainly revere it – devoting an entire holiday, Theme parks and Movie industry to the celebration of fear.
Fear manifests in us in the form of Fight or Flight, however having learnt that there is another impulse that we can use in times when fear takes hold
..... Face........
Its not about Face the fear with strength, bravado, aggression or brute strength.
Its about facing as in understanding .... it's origin, its growth, its rationality, its benefits and the harm that it can cause
I became intrigued, I began to researched into this subject further, my understanding for a long time had been that Fear is an illusion, an excuse, a push back to help keep us safe.
A story that we have told ourselves so often that we now believe it.
Using our thoughts against ourselves, we are able to justify our lack of action in areas where we perceive a threat. There are moments though when we are doing this that we do not realise that this is what we are doing at all.
We often learn our way of dealing with, recognising and at time acknowledging that Fear is present from our parents, peers, classmates, friends, work colleagues and the list continues. Fear is a conditioned thing not a natural state of being.
Take a look at a baby or small child the next time one is near and notice the little impulses and actions that show that they have no FEAR. Notice the adult, parent or carer who is with them at the time and how they react to that lack of fear in the child.
Who is the one that reacts with FEAR?
If we have the concept to learn something we have the ability to change and ammend what we have learnt, that is mixed up inside our BELIEFS and our VALUES
If you have learnt something and therefore now believe it, the exciting news here is you can change your beliefs.
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We often use a past history of an event, conversation, a learning, and / or an opinion of someone we hold dear as proof that something that is yet to happen, is dangerous. This perception though is often false.
We have no solid proof that this perception will result in the ending that we FEAR.
Interestingly most FEAR's are of the exact same thing, however they present them selves as different fears to fool and confuse us.
DEATH - no matter how you label it most fears are the fear of DEATH wrapped up in a label that takes that word out of the fear entirely.
Fear of ill health... you may die
Fear of Falling ..... you may die
Fear of Spiders..... you may die
Fear of Heights.... you may die
Fear of a Virus .... you may die
Fear of failing... you may die (well maybe not.. but I did say most)
Fear of Failure... My that's a big one that almost every one of us has felt or is feeling right now.
The idea that our ideas are not good enough, sensible enough, well known enough, clever enough, wanted enough can send us into a spiral of self doubt that we never give our ideas a chance to take hold and therefore we do not feel the breeze of success around us.
But here's the thing...
Every idea ever though has it's place and every success that has been made started with a though that someone else laughed at or believed was not worthwhile.
Can you imagine our world today if The Wright Brothers had listened to the Doubters, If Leonard Kleinrock , ( Don't know who he is? Go look him up and see just how special his idea was..... ) hadn't thought his work was important when people laughed at him in 1969.Not all ideas come from celebrities' and the financially wealthy.
When Walt Disney way laughed at and told that his idea of Walt Disney world would not happen, by over 300 bank managers when he was looking for a loan to start works on his dream.
Don't get me wrong, there are some fears that are still there to keep us safe.
Fear of stepping off a cliff.....
Fear of getting into a fight with a wild animal,,,,
Fear of Stepping out in front of a moving vehicle...
You get the idea. I am not talking about these Important and useful fears, I am talking about the health altering, mind stressing, irrational and unproven fears.
Instead of spending so much time thinking about trying not to die when it is inevitable that this will happen to all of us.
Why don't we all spend more time and thoughts on things that enhance our lives and possibly let us live longer and healthier ones.
I call this
"Freedom to live and the Fantastic World of Ideas"
As well as us keeping ourselves in a state of fear.
FEAR is also used by others to keep us subservient.
Used by the Media and Politicians to "Educate and Update".
In the news this evening as I type this, the News reporter has used the words
"With the Virus lurking in the community"
Like a Burglar hiding behind a fence... They have given the COVID-19 Virus, a personality!
The idea that we have all now lost control in this time of Pandemic, we are unable to protect ourselves so we are relying on Politicians who have an agenda of 95% goal to vaccinate us.
Employers are, scaring people further by saying if you are not vaccinated you wont have a job, Airlines saying you wont be able to travel again.
This FEAR is fueling the plan to Vaccinate 95% of the public...
We all deserve personal choice, when this is taken away its a step toward communities and society breaking down. We have a choice to take FEAR out of our personal agendas for ourselves and we have a choice on what and where we stand in Society
We all have the right to choose. Whether that choice is to be fearful, or to take or not take the Vaccine.
We do not have to join in with this Spiral of Drama and Chaos... we have a choice, although it may seem very hard to think or feel that at times.
Taking responsibility for what we listen too, what we watch, how much information we want to take in is the 1st step we can take to calming the fear, soothing the Anxiety, releasing the stress and taking back control.....
I was once told by a client that they always put on an imaginary bright Yellow rain coat when things begin to get to stressful and they need a tool to shelter under whilst they get away from the stressful situation. I loved this analogy. Using a toll that helps you to shelter from your fears is indeed a great idea, as long as you do not use that tool so much that you never take it off...
If I hadn't turned off the COVID-19, Drama spiral I would not have left France, travelled to Australia and spent 2 years travelling around the country I was born in but never saw! (However that is another subject for another Blog)..........
FEAR is used by ourselves to keep us safe and in comfort, at times to our expense.
If we stopped for just a moment and added common sense, a little bit of self responsibility and the learning from our forefathers and those before them, we would actually come to the realisation that we do not live in a world as dangerous as the Marketing gurus and Politicians would have us believe.
Have we gone from being Customers/ Clients/ Constituants
to being Fear Puppets!?
I was once a fear puppet....
Constantly wanting my kids to have what they wanted, scared of them being left behind their friends. Buying a bigger house, in a better area, every couple of years.
Taking promotions when I knew the stress would outweigh the Benefits
I lived in Suburbia, had a job I didn't like, acted responsible, within the guidelines of the society I was living in.
What I ended up with, as well as a lot of useless material items, was a brain full of fog, an elevated heart rate, repeating chronic illness and a comfort zone so padded that I stopped doing many things that I loved to do.
I was unhappy and unfulfilled, although I had an income, a wonderful family, a comfortable home and friends.
I had lost myself! Does any of this sound familiar? to you or for someone your know and love?
Fear had taken away who I was and replace her with someone who conformed.
I had always prided myself on being someone who doesn't conform for conform sake, I was a fraud, a scared, stressed, sick fraud.
Discovering that FEAR is just a concept, a Word that we repeat to ourselves to excuse not doing things that may hurt us was liberating!
I had been hurting myself being in FEAR... what did I risk loosing by looking into Fear closely and seeing what my options are.?
I can now give you an alternative....
Lets work out together how to protect ourselves more, arm ourselves with education that teaches us that our thoughts used as our brain medicine, can be so helpful in de-stressing ourselves to make our immune systems healthier and stronger, able to fight off illness and Viruses.
Building our mindsets to a strong state that WE decide what happens next to us.
Your idea and dreams are just as important as those and countless others who have ended up with ideas so amazing that our world today works the way it does.
Now not every idea is ground breaking or going to be taken on by the corporations , many are small and very personal and to me they are the most important ones. Ideas that keep us moving forward in our personal lives feeling confident, and self motivated. Those that bring a smile to our face when we think of them. Those are the ideas that must not be squashed by FEAR.
To learn more : please get in touch by email for more information on our -
a lesson in taking back control......
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